ABOUT ME

So first I'm going to explain my orientation. I'm a bisexual male with short brown hair and blue eyes, I have been called handsome in the past but that's a matter of perspective. I'm going to tell a story about my last long term relationship and how she left me as I am now.

My last relationship has left me kind of broken. We were together for about 8 years, 4 of which were in high school, but it ended 5 years ago and I haven't been in one since. I am still a virgin. My partner would often get angry or insult me for even bringing up the idea of having sex which has left me fearful of even bringing up the subject in a face to face situation. Eventually I decided to move away for college and we decided to end things. I've since learned that she's in an active sexual relationship which has left me with doubts about my own attractiveness and I haven't quite gotten over that.

This woman has hurt me and left me pretty much feeling worthless. My confidence has been broken all because she made me think that even talking about sex is a bad thing and I haven't been able to initiate any kind of relationship since we broke up. Learning that she allowed another man to have sex with her in less time than we were together also hurt and while I respect her decision to choose who she sleeps with, I wish she hadn't strung me along the way she did or that I had ended things sooner.

I now know it isn't selfish or mean to end a relationship if I'm not satisfied with how things are progressing sexually, especially after waiting 8 years. I wanted more than sex of course, I had ideas of us living together and starting a family, but she just wasn't into me but instead of ending things she strung me along with false promises only to make up an excuse not to go through with it at the last second. Maybe she just didn't want to be single? I dunno...

That's why I'm here, to openly discuss my fantasies and perhaps meet someone who will help me get over my anxieties. There was only one instance where my girlfriend even let me touch her intimately and it was entirely her idea. She wanted to be over my knee and spanked so I obliged, hoping it would lead to more. It didn't and even after I brought her to orgasm with my hand she refused to return the favor, even going as far as to insult me for even asking.

Okay enough self loathing...

MY FANTASY

This took me a long time to write. As I said I have trouble admitting my desires so although it may seem easy while reading it, please understand that this was not easy for me.

My preferred role is a bottom and I'm happy with a man or a woman. I'm willing to start things off online but I don't want things to progress quickly, I'm looking for a relationship, not a fling. I am aware that BOTS and Scammers are around so you'll forgive this anxious young fool for being extra careful.

As stated, I am a virgin and have some trouble talking about or asking for sex thanks to my last relationship where asking would usually get me in trouble with her. Don't beat around the bush with me, I'm not good at picking up hints and making assumptions as all they've ever brought me is abuse. I'm always afraid I'll make someone angry by assuming.

MY LIKES

Bear in mind that I am a virgin and a lot of these 'likes' are just things I think I will like but cannot say for sure until actually done.

1. Being Touched - This may seem obvious but let me explain. I have sensitive skin, so much so that I can even tickle myself or at least illicit a reaction by myself. I don't mean masturbation or handjobs either, I mean simple touching. The idea of someone exploring my body is something I would be willing to try.
   

2. Being Tied Up - Another thing I would like to try is being tied up and immobile. Completely unable to stop my Master/Mistress from touching me. As I said before, I have sensitive skin so I feel this would work for me.
   

3. Slave Play - I'm a bottom, no if and or but. Asserting myself is something I cannot do, I'm sooner to run from confrontation than fight back. If anyone is open to the idea of slave play then I'm all for it and I'm going to be blunt, I would happily submit to a 24/7 slave role if a relationship reaches that stage of trust and, most importantly, love and respect. Also make a safe word.
   

4. I Love, Love - For a man I'm very much in touch with my more feminine side. I want to be in love and to be loved back. Even if I agree to a 24/7 with a partner, the love has to be there.
   
   MY DISLIKES
   

5. Scat - Just no, I'm sorry but no
6. Pissing - Please just keep it in the bathroom

7. Severe Pain - Sensitive skin so no things like cutting the skin or severe bodily harm
   
   So that's me in all my broken, possibly neurotic glory. I'd love to hear from you!
   
   Desires and Fantasies
   My biggest desire is to find someone willing to enter into a 24/7 relationship with me.
   
   I have no problems with my body though I may be slightly overweight but if you desire it, I will lose it. I'm also a nudist so if you want me to forsake clothing, I will do so.
   
   My only no-no is being naked around kids and my family. Make sure people know that you keep a naked slave at home and are comfortable with the idea. If you want to use me in front of guests, I will not resist but make sure your guests are okay with it.
   
   When we're alone however, I'm all yours!